My name is John
I come from the small town 440 (Lorain)
I'm supposedly "Graced By God" but in my eyes, I control my own life
I have the mindset of a charging bull, when I set my mind on one goal
I charge at that goal till it is achieved, nothing can get in my way to obtain my goal
A man can be told he will never obtain his dreams
I'm a man with a heart filled with desire, the desire to put my mind to its limit
My name is of Hebrew descent, my heritage is of the jews, people who no matter how badly they were whipped, beaten, and shot to death in the end they still believed that one day they will be free
I'm the type of man that no matter how hard you beat my down physically and emotionally, I will fight till the bitter end
The dead grass around me blazes under me like an athletes burning desire to be the best ever
If you compared Ghandi, and Muhammud Ali's personalities, that is who I am
I am a man of peace, I would rather solve problems with words then violence, but when I am tested and the first punch is thrown, I will take every hit and throw a punch back with twice the power
I am a man of peace and serenity, but when push comes to shove, I have the heart of a lion
I love how you put a lot of feeling into this poem, it's very emotional and I loved it !
ReplyDeleteI've only seen one error in your whole poem but other wise very good
ReplyDeleteKeep fighting for your dreams don't let no one tell you you can't show us how great you are I love the heart of a lion line
ReplyDeleteI liked how you said that even though your name means graced by god that you control your own life
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ReplyDeleteI like how you said when I set my mind I charge like a bull, I can relate to that because I'm very hardheaded so when I set my mind to something no one can change it or do anything to stop me from achieving my goal. Great use of word. Very well done
ReplyDeleteI loved how you put your emotions into the poem and described your personality.
ReplyDeleteThat was dope john I like how you were comparing yourself to all great things showing the greatness within you
ReplyDeleteI like how you described where your name came from and how it relates to you. I also like how you didn't think the meaning of your name fits you and you put your own meaning to it.
ReplyDeleteReally loved this poem shows that you won't stop what you believe in boy loved that in you!!!!Amazing poem my friend!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI like how you said that you want peace until someone comes and throws a punch at you. It's understandable even if it's a physical punch or an emotional punch you want to fight back to not let anyone bring you down. I like how you also said you chose what you do not your name.
ReplyDeleteJohn,
ReplyDeleteExcellent job. You have some awesome imagery here (dead grass blazing around ...) that really allows your readers to picture what your saying.
Great poem. I like how you use what happened to the Jews and how you said you were like them in a way. I'm not good at explaining so hopefully you know what I mean. :)
ReplyDeleteThat was very well said. I can tell you are a peaceful man and will do all you can to solve everything with words.
ReplyDeleteI loved your poem. Your diction is very well.
ReplyDeleteOk Muhammad Ali ! Lol very nice poem , I like how you said "no matter how hard you beat me physically or emotionally , I will fight to the end." That's shows you have strength and courage! Good job Johnny boiiii !
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